My oldest son turned three last Saturday.  He got a bicycle, Candy Land, clothes, and Diamondbacks gear, amongst other things. Back to Candy Land, it’s a version with dice, pawns, a board and everything. Contrary to rumor, they still do make board games that aren’t iPhone apps. 

My youngest son, a mere eight months old, has discovered mobility. The cats now have no refute from the crawing, drooling terror. Having done really well with pulling up on the coffee table, walking is imminant. 

Change happens. People stop reading newspapers. Cassette players disappear. Games go digital. Kids grow. People get older. I hate it.

Unless Sara and I go all “Bradgelina”, this is our one and only go round with kids. And while we’ll always have photos and videos of them in their younger days, it doesn’t quite capture those small, progressive moments of learning or experiences. Everything seems to be blink and you’ll miss it with child raising. One day, Kieran couldn’t crawl forward. They day after, he’s a crawling fool.

Casey is the smartest one in the Brown household. Even though his compete sentences make no sense “ Daddy, I feel wash TV. Yes” you kind-of get what he’s talking about. Then there’s the other side of the coin:ABC’s and 123’s..no sweat. Remembering words in a book. Fine. Poo in the potty? Not for me, thanks.

Yes, there are things that you’d like them to get a hold of quickly. But when you see them correctly naming colors and cutting perfect squares, I’m amazed and saddened to see them progress. I’ve become so used to having both of them rely on me, that I’ll have a hard time coming to terms when they DON’T need me. It’s not that my life was “worse” before I got my iPhone, but having one really opened by eyes to progress and change (not to mention the ability to check e-mail on the toilet…or so I’ve heard). It’s the same with the constant evolution of Casey and Kieran. They’re growing stronger, faster, better every day. Compete sentences. Honest giggles when something I do amuses them (an ability that Sara lost back in, say, 2003). My eyes are more open to progress and change.

Birthdays are occasions to celebrate. Yet, I feel like they’re reasons to mourn the loss of innocence. They boys are getting older, and the time I’ll have to spend with them is getting “shorter”. I realize I have no Dr. Manhattan-like powers where I can manipulate and travel through time and space (which would, if nothing else, make my commute better). Stopping them from growing wouldn’t solve any problems.

Barenaked Ladies lost a founding member. There’s a new Yankee Stadium opening. Noting stays the same unless it’s a Kodac moment. We celebrate birthdays as progress, but I can’t help lament the loss of Casey’s innocence. Sure, there’s a lot to look forward to, but sometimes I like to linger on the past. Helps put progress in perspective. 

But things can’t be all bad. They still make Candy Land.